


oh, to live in this void to escape the sound

by ohlovelysunshine



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Angst, Dissociation, Hurt/Comfort, Mental Breakdown, POV Third Person, Past Child Abuse, Trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-12
Updated: 2020-10-12
Packaged: 2021-03-08 04:20:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 610
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26979481
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohlovelysunshine/pseuds/ohlovelysunshine
Summary: again, again, again, he fills his mind with void to drown out the sound.—(or: dave really wishes he had a designated place for his noise-cancelling headphones.)
Relationships: Dave Strider & Dirk Strider
Comments: 1
Kudos: 28





	oh, to live in this void to escape the sound

**Author's Note:**

> no clue which headmate wrote this; might be an unregistered one. i don’t think they mind this being treated as an actual fictional story but i’m 99.99% sure it has actual connection to their exotrauma so uh. watch your step?
> 
> also before anyone fucking dares to say it. this is not str-d-rc-st my GOD
> 
> \- arkansis

where did he put them.

oh, fuck.

he scrambles around his room, opening drawers, looking under, over, out, in, searchingsearching _searching_ —

where are they—

jolts as the door opens, why does it creak so loud, who’s here, stop, stop making sound

the voice is too loud, he doesn’t know, doesn’t process the words, sees only the figure who speaks them—

_bro_

he’s in the way he’s trapping him is he going to hurt him? he can’t strife _here_ maybe he just wants to beat him to the ground oh no

_clang shhk clash_

is it in his head

he doesn’t know, it’s too loud in his ears, he doesn’t see a sword or metal or a weapon at all but he _hears hears hears_

bro—is it bro? it has to be it has to be he’ll never escape him—steps forward

_there exit RUN_

he runs escapes flees flashsteps right in that small nook of space _gone_

safe? not safe he can still hear sounds so many.

is the thumping his footsteps or his heartbeat or both

doesn’t matter they’re loudloud _loud_

loud isn’t good loud is dangerous loud is getting caught loud is giving him away loud is making him a target loud is bad. sound is bad QUIET

no quiet he doesn’t get quiet. headphones—

they make things quiet where did he put them. quiet is safe quiet is warm quiet is the void that protects him.

door? closet

_there maybe please be there_

opens—

doesn’t see but grabs snatches THROWS all over the floor WHERE

not there

he thinks he’s crying. bad bad striders don’t cry

he left without his shades too god what was he _doing thinking_ —

“dave?”

he doesn’t know if it’s meant to be loud but it IS. pierces his ears breaks him, scares him out of his skin and right back in,

that texan edge that drawl that

_BRO_

he runs again, to the stairs misses the first step,

crashes down

his hand hurts did something crack he HEARD heard heard stop hearing no more sound no more s

he’s touched and his own scream is too painful,

too much

no

“ _davedavedave_ , stop, breathe, here—”

it hurts to breathe get off—

hands cover his ears, clasp over them tight and suddenly everything is dulled,

it’s okay.

he’s okay.

his wrist hurts _burns_ like hell but

the sound is faded far far away. that’s good that’s safe that’s okay.

clutches the injury, looks up—

oh.

it’s just dirk.

it’s not bro it’s _dirk_. sunglasses gone because he knows, he knows that that’s what makes more of a difference, knows that’s how he can be sure,

sure it isn’t bro

sure it isn’t the monster who made him like this

sure that he’s safe.

his voice is harder to hear but that’s _good_ and he can still make the words out just fine,

“dave, i’m going to find your headphones, then i’m going to get someone to check up on you to see how bad that fall was. i’m not leaving you. i just need you to cover your ears with your hands the best you can, like i’m doing right now, okay? i’ll be as quiet as i can.”

it’s a lot to say but dirk says it slowly,

slow slow slow so dave’s head will stop rushing, swimming,

it helps a bit, he nods, he understands,

dirk’s hands move, _nonono please no more sound_ —

take his, lift up,

everything is dull again.

not as dull as just before because pressing hard hurts, but it’s good.

it’s quiet.

and quiet is safe.

dirk isn’t bro.

never was.

never will be.

dave is okay.

**Author's Note:**

> to complete the rushed energy this was done in like. _maybe_ 30 minutes. so. yeah.
> 
> \- arkansis


End file.
